Lara Raulf is an economic psychologist, business coach in training, mother of two children, and a passionate personnel developer at DONNER & REUSCHEL Aktiengesellschaft in Hamburg. As a source of inspiration, Lara regularly writes about current and forward-looking topics in the area of Learning & Development at Fondsfrauen. Her focus is on modern leadership, appreciation in everyday work, empowerment, and transformation. This time, Lara reflects on the topic of self-defense and empowerment.
Do you know your strengths? How do you handle challenges and crises? Where are your boundaries, and how naturally can you defend them in everyday life?
In my role in HR, I have encountered many colorful personalities, strengths, interests, ambitions, and challenges over the past 10 years. A common thread among many of these encounters is the desire for continuous development and self-determination – for empowerment.
For this reason, I am very excited about an inspiring conversation I had last week with Till Völzke. Till empowers women in a very special way with his company "feem," through realistic self-defense.
Realistic self-defense aims to feel inner security and become aware of one's own strengths and boundaries.
Surely, many of you have experienced situations where you found yourself feeling uncomfortable or even threatened due to a violation of your boundaries. During my conversation with Till, I certainly had situations in mind where I felt weakened or diminished in the past. Remarks that bothered me and yet I tolerated them.
"If you know what you're capable of, you radiate it!" – Till's attitude. I agree! Setting boundaries is a sign of strength, autonomy, courage, and empowerment. And the beauty is: setting boundaries can be practiced. In other words: it takes two to tango – setting boundaries must be practiced. I'll do it, who's dancing with me? 😉
Since I found the exchange so valuable, I've summarized a few AHA! moments for you:
- Training Self-Protection
Self-protection can be trained with simple means and, despite the seriousness of the topic, also with a bit of humor. - Eye contact:Try looking directly into the eyes of everyone you meet in the pedestrian zone. This little exercise trains your confrontation skills and demonstrates an equal encounter.
- Embodiment: Adopt a confident posture during your evening walk. Make yourself big, because posture affects mood. Perpetrators usually choose victims where they expect a large power imbalance.
- Communnication:Play with the volume and tempo of your speech in communication. If you usually speak quietly, the following might be a brave next step: next Sunday, when entering the bakery, greet everyone present with a clear and loud "Good morning!" (or "MOIN!" in Hamburg). An even stronger effect is achieved with a "MOIN everyone!". This direct approach trains us to appear confident and decisive and has a great impact on our environment.
- Reflecting physical and mental boundaries:For example, observe in the supermarket checkout line how much physical proximity is appropriate for you and where a boundary is crossed for you. Similarly, you can question where mental boundaries are crossed in both your professional and private life. As soon as something no longer feels right: address it with an "I-statement". Be clear, explicit, and as objective as possible – even if it initially requires overcoming. Once you start standing up for yourself, it becomes easier and more routine.
How do self-defense and empowerment fit together?
Those who know themselves well, continually redefine boundaries, and learn methods to defend them, experience a sustainable, strong sense of self-confidence and self-worth. The effect of this on our environment is immense. Therefore, self-defense is an impressive way to solidify and develop one's personality besides physical training.
For more information about feem klick here.
If you want to know more about Lara Raulf, you will find more info Here .
Lara would be delighted if you suggest further topics for this column on the Fondsfrauen blog!